Homeschool Diva

Oh another fun installment of the funniest things kids say. One letter can make all the difference.

Today I took our 4 year old for a check up.  Afterward, we went to the grocery store.  As we moved along, we came to the cheese aisle.  Hudson picked up a round of cheese and asked what it was.  I said “Gouda” and Chloe said, “Mom that is what some people worship instead of Jesus?” with the most perplexed look on her face.

I said “No honey Gouda, not Buddha.”

And I tried not to laugh as we set it back down and put the eggs in the cart.

Really people this is the most fun ever!

From Jackson - just shy of 7

J- Mama - Do the poeple live on the bottom of the earth see everything upside down?

Me - No son it is all about perspective.  (I am stalling because, for the life of me don’t know how to explain it)

J - Well, why don’t they fall off?

Me - because of gravity.

J - what’s that?

Me - it’s the stuff that holds us on the earth, so we all don’t fly off. A guy named Newton figured it out. ( I know, I know you love my expert description.)

J- silent…

So I am off to the library today to check out something about Newton. Any ideas?

4:34

Chloe: “Mom, I want to take the training wheels off my bike.”

Me: “Well, honey the wrench is in the garage. ”

Chloe: “I know Mom, please I know I can do it.”

Me: “Well, the garage is such a mess, we may have to wait for Daddy to come home.” (I am stalling because I don’t want to do the running along side thing right now.)

Chloe: “Mom, I know where it is, PLEASE!”

Me: “Well, honey it isn’t like you are going to just get on and go like your brother does now. He had to practice to get that good. It is going to take some practice.” (I am still stalling)

Chloe: “I know that, I want to practice, right now.”

Me: “You really think you can do it?”

Chloe: “YES MOM I KNOW I CAN DO IT!”

Me: “OK - Let’s give it a try.” ( I finally get that there is no way we are not trying this, so I embrace it, and gear up mentally to do the run along side thing.)

4:45

The training wheels are off and we begin. After about three passes she has the balance thing, but we need to work on steering and breaking.

5:00 Daddy home, park the bike out front, eat dinner.

6:00 Family clean up time. I remind everyone that we need to put our outside toys away in the garage. She hops on the bike again and rides it around to the back alley where she sees another family with her friend, and then I felt it in her spirit. It was like “sea biscuit”. She said “Let go Mom I can do it!” and with all the force her little frame could exert, she was off. And not a casual pace, I mean I couldn’t even keep up running along side her, let alone stop her from falling. I gulped and said a quiet prayer and she rode away from me, like she had been riding her bike for years. (Wow that is a metaphor for parenting, isn’t it?)

6:15 All the other little girls in the neighborhood wanted their training wheels off too. (Way to lead by example Chloe!)

6:15 - 7:00 Riding, and Riding and Riding, steering and breaking are old hat.

Today we work on starting by herself and at 4 and three quarters our little Chloe is a dare devil on wheels!

Oh the days they are a flyin’ people! Next thing I know she will want the keys to the car!

Jackson: “Mommy, what is a fancy word for asks a lot of questions?”

Me: Umm, well lets look one up.

Jackson:  I think it is inquisitive.  Is that right Mama?

Me: You are right.

Jackson:  Mama, I am very inquisitive.

Yes son we know!  At times, your inquisitiveness wears us out!

offered in passing…..

Jackson: “Mommy, I think your way is much better than my way.  It doesn’t make such a gloppy mess.”

Great Scott can we get those words engraved and posted somewhere to refer to often?

Seems our family is full of it these days! While outside at the park…..

H: Mommy can we take a teko back home and get my fire truck?

Me: Honey we can’t go home.  We have to take an airplane to get home.

H:No we don’t Mommy, our house is right over there, we can all fit in a teko.  Please!?

Me:  Honey We can’t just run home.  I am sorry!

H: I promise I wont hit anyone with it Mommy.  It will be fun. Come on it is a great idea.

Conversation ended in a stalemate.  I could never convince him that we were not 10 minutes from home and that we are in South America.

A little context first.  I told the kids they could have a scoop of ice-cream in the afternoon after Hudson woke up from his nap.

Chloe: “Mom can I wake Hudson up?”

Mom: Thoughtfully thinking because there are times I ask her to do this so he doesn’t sleep too long. Before I can answer she continues.

Chloe: “Because it is getting late, and I want to go to the park and I don’t want to wait any longer for my ice cream.”

Mom: “Yes you can.” Not because of the ice cream but because of the length of nap, but she can bask in the ice cream goodness anyway.

This conversation happened after Jackson would not allow his sister a turn with a given toy.

Me: “Jackson don’t hog it!”

J: “What did you say Mommy?”

Me:  I said, “Jackson don’t hog it!”

J: “What did you say Mommy?”

Me: “DON’T HOG IT!”

Jackson: “I believe the word you are meaning Mommy is “hoard” it!”

I guess that is the better way to say it. Conversation ends with Mom and Dad laughing hysterically.

Last night Hudson and I were having a conversation after he had been disciplined by his Daddy for speaking disrespectfully.

“Hudson, you know Mommy and Daddy discipline you because we love you.”

“Yes, Mama.”

“What does Mommy and Daddy want you to grow up into?” (Typically, this is the point that Mike and I explain how we want them to grow in to men who are respectful to people and especially women, who love children and are kind and generous.  We say the same type of thing every time so I wondered if he was starting to absorb that.)

“Mama, you want me to grow to a man who opens doors for ladies”

Close Buddy!  That is a good start we can build on it!

Here is  a snippet of a conversation our children had amongst themselves while cleaning and reorganizing their toys. I wish I had it  on tape to play it back to them when I need it:-)

Jackson:  It is so fun to play with your toys when they are picked up.

Chloe: Yeah you can see everything you need and I know where all my babies clothes are.

Hudson: Silently stacking blocks on a clean floor.

 Jackson: Yeah you can’t think when everything is such a mess! 

OK - People I have been saying this for years!  I think they are starting to get it!

“Mom, I am pretty sure that in heaven we will not need toys to entertain ourselves.” Jackson~6 years old. 

 I am pretty sure he is right!

 Di Vinci was depicting two very important people and he named this painting Virgin of the Rocks.

Mommy, what is a virgin?  (ummmmm deafening silence)…….

And why do those  babies have such big muscles?  (again crickets chirping in the background)

I am all out of bullets on that one! 

Let’s get our math books out kids!

“I want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich please!”

“OK - Bud”

“Yeah but I don’t want the jelly”

“You don’t?”

“Yeah and I don’t want the peanut butter!”

“hmmmmm?”

~Hudson 2.5 years old~