Comments on: Being Present the key to freedom! http://www.homeschool-diva.com/2008/03/15/being-present-the-key-to-freedom/ Wed, 07 Jan 2009 17:05:22 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.2.1 By: Amber http://www.homeschool-diva.com/2008/03/15/being-present-the-key-to-freedom/#comment-3130 Amber Sun, 16 Mar 2008 15:42:31 +0000 http://www.homeschool-diva.com/2008/03/15/being-present-the-key-to-freedom/#comment-3130 Cathy, I completely understand. There was a point in my parenting that I made a very strong and conscious decision to encourage every Mom with young children I meet. I found that comes around very seldom. Most people would say to me, "Boy you have your hands full." or "Are they all yours?"like I had a dozen or something and "You actually go grocery shopping with ALL of them?". There were days I felt like saying, "What do you expect me to do, leave them at home?" Now I just say, "I have my hands full in the best possible way!" On the other hand I felt like I was being judged by families with older or fully grown children, like I didn't parent enough, discipline enough, whatever, whatever. Then my friends with out any children, couldn't understand why I was so overwhelmed, cranky and tired. I remember someone actually saying, "What is her problem. She chose this path.", and another dating couple pulled Mike aside to "speak" to him about me. Being 4 months pregnant, throwing up and sick with an 6 month old and a 2 year old, I was a bit too cranky for them. I had offended them in some way, or they felt like I was controlling Mike with needing to get home quickly. Well, they apologized a year later after being married and newly pregnant they understood. Now, every Mom I see at a play date, park or grocery store, I smile and say, "Good job! You are doing great, it gets easier and in about X amount of months, you will be having the time of your life.". Then if they ask, I casually offer a few tips that helped me make it and explain that in the beginning, you are learning to survive. Give yourself a break, enjoy the moment. I find the most encouraging words are "I understand, you are not alone!" and "You are doing a great job!" evoke teary smiles from weary Mama's who are praying they make it to the next day. Christian or not. So sistah, with 4 all a year apart! You are my hero. You are doing a great job! Your kids are beautiful and anyone who is organized enough to send me an abacus gets a standing O from me that is for sure:-)Jeff, I am very aware of how fleeting time is, so we are making every effort to be present with our kids because we know the time spent now, will build deep, long lasting relationship for eternity. Blessings to you both! a Cathy,
I completely understand. There was a point in my parenting that I made a very strong and conscious decision to encourage every Mom with young children I meet. I found that comes around very seldom. Most people would say to me, “Boy you have your hands full.” or “Are they all yours?”like I had a dozen or something and “You actually go grocery shopping with ALL of them?”. There were days I felt like saying, “What do you expect me to do, leave them at home?” Now I just say, “I have my hands full in the best possible way!”

On the other hand I felt like I was being judged by families with older or fully grown children, like I didn’t parent enough, discipline enough, whatever, whatever. Then my friends with out any children, couldn’t understand why I was so overwhelmed, cranky and tired. I remember someone actually saying, “What is her problem. She chose this path.”, and another dating couple pulled Mike aside to “speak” to him about me. Being 4 months pregnant, throwing up and sick with an 6 month old and a 2 year old, I was a bit too cranky for them. I had offended them in some way, or they felt like I was controlling Mike with needing to get home quickly. Well, they apologized a year later after being married and newly pregnant they understood.

Now, every Mom I see at a play date, park or grocery store, I smile and say, “Good job! You are doing great, it gets easier and in about X amount of months, you will be having the time of your life.”. Then if they ask, I casually offer a few tips that helped me make it and explain that in the beginning, you are learning to survive. Give yourself a break, enjoy the moment. I find the most encouraging words are “I understand, you are not alone!” and “You are doing a great job!” evoke teary smiles from weary Mama’s who are praying they make it to the next day. Christian or not.

So sistah, with 4 all a year apart! You are my hero. You are doing a great job! Your kids are beautiful and anyone who is organized enough to send me an abacus gets a standing O from me that is for sure:-)Jeff, I am very aware of how fleeting time is, so we are making every effort to be present with our kids because we know the time spent now, will build deep, long lasting relationship for eternity.

Blessings to you both!
a

]]> By: Jeff Morgan http://www.homeschool-diva.com/2008/03/15/being-present-the-key-to-freedom/#comment-3124 Jeff Morgan Sun, 16 Mar 2008 05:12:26 +0000 http://www.homeschool-diva.com/2008/03/15/being-present-the-key-to-freedom/#comment-3124 Amber, As a homeschool dad(well ok Carol homeschooled and I was the principal) of a 26 yar old and a 24 year old, I can tell you that you are on the right track. They wont be this wonder-filled age forever. I think empty nest was about one of the worst things I have gone through. Carol and I ran our buisness in those days and eventhough I wasn't in the home much, our office was just across the yard and the girls felt like they could open my office door whenever they wanted to be with dad. Enjoy these years...you'll be planning a wedding and baby showers soon enough. Carol and I have! Jeff Amber,

As a homeschool dad(well ok Carol homeschooled and I was the principal) of a 26 yar old and a 24 year old, I can tell you that you are on the right track. They wont be this wonder-filled age forever. I think empty nest was about one of the worst things I have gone through. Carol and I ran our buisness in those days and eventhough I wasn’t in the home much, our office was just across the yard and the girls felt like they could open my office door whenever they wanted to be with dad.

Enjoy these years…you’ll be planning a wedding and baby showers soon enough. Carol and I have!

Jeff

]]> By: Cathy http://www.homeschool-diva.com/2008/03/15/being-present-the-key-to-freedom/#comment-3122 Cathy Sun, 16 Mar 2008 04:48:06 +0000 http://www.homeschool-diva.com/2008/03/15/being-present-the-key-to-freedom/#comment-3122 Hi Amber, Thank you for this post!! It is very encouraging. I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Although getting to the tunnel means cleaning up the trains tracks left on the floor and realizing the "light" is a flashlight that some little person left on!! I'm looking forward to learning with my kids too and can't wait to see what God has to teach me through teaching them!! Hi Amber,
Thank you for this post!! It is very encouraging. I’m starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Although getting to the tunnel means cleaning up the trains tracks left on the floor and realizing the “light” is a flashlight that some little person left on!! I’m looking forward to learning with my kids too and can’t wait to see what God has to teach me through teaching them!!

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